The voices holding you back have names.
The Judge who criticises you, the Controller who won’t let go, the Pleaser who always says yes. These are inner saboteurs: mental patterns that once protected us and now cost us energy, peace of mind and relationships.
“What are they?”
One Judge and nine accomplices.
We all have the Judge: it’s the master saboteur. Alongside it, each of us has one or two accomplices that speak louder than the rest. Do you recognise yourself in any of them?
The Judge
Always finds something wrong: with you, with others, with what’s happening. It’s the saboteur we all have, and the one that gives the others their voice.
The Controller
Needs to keep everything under control. When it can’t, anxiety rises and other people become an obstacle.
The Stickler
Wants order and perfection. Nothing is ever done well enough, by you or by anyone else.
The Pleaser
Seeks approval by helping and saying yes, even when it would rather say no. Meanwhile it forgets its own needs.
The Hyper-Achiever
Your worth depends on what you achieve. A goal reached doesn’t last long: the next one is already waiting.
The Victim
Focuses on pain and injustice to get attention and affection. And ends up feeling powerless.
The Hyper-Rational
Runs everything through the filter of logic, relationships included. Emotions, its own and other people’s, are kept at a distance.
The Hyper-Vigilant
Sees danger everywhere and never relaxes. It keeps asking what could go wrong.
The Restless
Always looking for the next thing, for new stimulation. It struggles to stay in the present, with what’s there.
The Avoider
Puts off unpleasant tasks and conflict. It would rather everything looked fine than face it.
“And on the other side?”
The inner sage.
Faced with the same difficulty, the sage doesn’t ask whose fault it is, but what can be done with it. It’s the part of you that meets things with calm and clarity, and it grows through five abilities.
Explore
Looking at what’s happening with curiosity instead of fear.
Empathise
Treating yourself and others with understanding, even when mistakes are made.
Innovate
Looking for new paths instead of repeating the ones that don’t work.
Navigate
Choosing your direction based on what really matters to you.
Activate
Acting decisively, without the noise of anxiety.
“How does the programme work?”
Recognise them, calm them, listen to the sage.
A structured programme in three phases. You don’t just discover which saboteurs you have: you learn to calm them and to talk with your inner sage.
Phase one
Recognise them
You learn to identify your saboteurs and to notice when they start talking.
Phase two
Turn down their volume
Practical techniques, for everyday use, to reduce their effect on your decisions and relationships.
Phase three
Listen to the sage
You make room for your inner sage: the part of you that can face difficulties with calm and clarity.
Format, length and upcoming dates are still being worked out. Write to me to find out when the next programme starts.
Ask me about the programme“Is it for individuals or for teams?”
Both.
In one-to-one coaching
When the same voice blocks you at work, in relationships, in your choices. Work on saboteurs weaves into your coaching, session by session.
One-to-one coachingIn organisations
Teams have their saboteurs too: the meeting where nobody disagrees, the perfectionism that slows everything down, the constant urgency. Working on them together changes the atmosphere and the way people work.
Working with organisations
Positive Intelligence® is a method developed by Shirzad Chamine. I’m a certified coach in its programme.
“Where do I begin?”
With a conversation.
Tell me which voice you hear loudest: we’ll work out together whether the programme is right for you, or for your team.